{"product_id":"no-assembly-hoodie","title":"No Assembly Hoodie","description":"\u003cp\u003eChristmas morning, box on the floor, two hundred tiny parts and a diagram drawn by someone who hates you. The dog already knows how this ends. He's seen it before.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eNo Assembly Required Is A Lie\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe box always says easy. The box always lies. Four hours in, you're missing a bolt, the instructions are in three languages you don't speak, and the dog is giving you that look. The one that says, told you so.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHand-drawn woodcut art catches the whole scene — tree lit up, presents torn open, hardware everywhere, and one very patient dog waiting for the swearing to start.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFABRIC\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% ring-spun cotton (solid colors)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeather blends include polyester for durability\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e4.5 oz weight - breathable but tough\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePre-shrunk and ready to work\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFIT\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eRegular fit - not fashion-forward slim\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eTrue to size\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eComfortable for all-day wear\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDRAWN IN AMERICA. PRINTED IN THE USA.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDesigned in the USA\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePrinted in the USA\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped from the USA\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eBlank tees sourced from premium global manufacturers\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":67981807911188,"sku":"40825557641494426630","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":67981807943956,"sku":"18340179787789683307","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":67981807976724,"sku":"69844221349107864392","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":67981808009492,"sku":"23279011681836165239","price":60.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":67981808042260,"sku":"19499001115732316652","price":62.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":67981808075028,"sku":"15088000090868240141","price":63.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ S","offer_id":67981798899988,"sku":"15643749932157500375","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ M","offer_id":67981798965524,"sku":"29267674498860224859","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ L","offer_id":67981799031060,"sku":"61171969653307692770","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ XL","offer_id":67981799096596,"sku":"20582567745684785185","price":60.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ 2XL","offer_id":67981799162132,"sku":"25527410420116285700","price":62.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ 3XL","offer_id":67981799227668,"sku":"18134892281458821020","price":63.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ S","offer_id":67981798932756,"sku":"17394992469921448810","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ M","offer_id":67981798998292,"sku":"91184490240914562314","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ L","offer_id":67981799063828,"sku":"46011342031971011357","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ XL","offer_id":67981799129364,"sku":"18522448899237256672","price":60.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ 2XL","offer_id":67981799194900,"sku":"18563844341474373693","price":62.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ 3XL","offer_id":67981799260436,"sku":"18723447479471560420","price":63.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0958\/8994\/8948\/files\/hoodie135-no-assembly-white.jpg?v=1793831620","url":"https:\/\/latigocowboy.com\/products\/no-assembly-hoodie","provider":"Latigo-Cowboy Authentics","version":"1.0","type":"link"}